.Publisher's Details: The adhering to is actually the message of a character from Expedition Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reviewing the events of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written very much about specifics of this particular purpose during the month I've been listed here, generally for two factors: the 1st being actually that there has been actually very little opportunity to do that sort of writing, and also secondly due to the fact that I'm not sure how relaxed I am actually discussing thought and feelings I show friends and family along with the rest of the globe.Effectively, clearly the globe changed today. What I point out or even carry out is actually extremely slight contrasted to the significance of what happened to our country today when it was actually struck through ... by whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we understand, I reckon. Hard to understand at whom to drive our rage and also concern ...I had merely ended up a lot of activities today, one of the most lengthy being actually the physical examinations of all workers members. In an exclusive talk observing that, the flight doctor informed me they were having an incredibly poor day on the ground. I had no tip ...He described the situation to me as ideal he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually overwhelmed, at that point alarmed. My 1st idea was that this had not been a genuine discussion, that I was actually still paying attention to one of my Tom Clancy strips. It only didn't seem achievable on this incrustation in our nation. I could not also envision the particulars, even prior to the information of more destruction began coming in.Vladimir came rather promptly, picking up that something really major was actually being talked about. I waved Michael in to the component as well. They were actually likewise astounded and stunned. After our company authorized off, I tried to reveal to Vladimir as well as Michael as finest I can the possible measurement of this particular act of fear in downtown Manhattan and also at the Government. They clearly recognized and also were very supportive.I eyed the Planet Map on the computer to view where over the globe we were actually and observed that our team were coming southeast away from Canada and also would be actually overlooking New England in a few minutes. I whized around the terminal up until I found a home window that would certainly offer me a view of New York City and also got hold of the local electronic camera. It happened to become a video camera, and I was appearing southern coming from the window of Michael's cabin.The smoke seemed to be to possess an odd blossom to it at the bottom of the pillar that was streaming south of the city. After reading among the news articles our team only acquired, I believe our experts were actually considering NY around the amount of time of, or even shortly after, the collapse of the second high rise. Exactly how terrible ...I scanned the video camera the whole time the East Coast to the south to view if I could view any other smoke around Washington, or even anywhere else, but absolutely nothing was visible.It was actually pretty complicated to think of work afterwards, though we possessed some to do, yet on the following track our experts crossed the United States more south. All three of us were working a couple of cams to attempt to acquire views of The big apple or even Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, yet no specific resource might be observed. Everything appeared amazing coming from a couple of hundred miles away. I can't think of the terrible settings on the ground.Other than the psychological effect of our country being actually dealt with as well as 1000s of our citizens as well as maybe some buddies being gotten rid of, the absolute most frustrating feeling being actually where I am is just one of isolation.Following day ... I think the fatigue and also mental tension got the greatest of me. I could not remain awake and remain to write. Today was still difficult, however our team began receiving more info, plus our experts had the tribute of speaking directly along with the Center Supervisor, Roy Estess, that ensured us that the ground teams would continue to work and also guarantee our security, in addition to the safe function of the Station. Our team additionally heard from our Manager, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the partners in the Course are all absolutely devoted to carrying on safe functions and help. These were never ever inquiries for me. I recognize all these folks! The ground groups have been surprisingly supportive, incredibly understanding of the effect of the news, and have attempted to be as beneficial as feasible. They have actually all been really specialist and also focused though I can't picture the interruption of this type of information coming in as well as the notion that authorities structures might be vulnerable. They never missed a beat, even when moving control centers. And also a team of elderly staffs and also friends offered our team a fairly detailed briefing about what was actually recognized and also what was being carried out in the authorities and also at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was really handy and kind of them to do in the middle of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has actually also been supporting as well as beneficial, trying to uplink news articles when our own assets were actually inoperable, and pointing out kind words ...My crewmates have actually been actually terrific, too. They know it is actually been a tough day for me and also the folks on the ground, and also they have actually attempted to become as even keeled as well as useful as possible. Michael also corrected me my preferred Borscht soup for dinner. And also they provide me plenty of area to assume when I needed it. They are actually quite thoughtful as well as obviously shocked at whoever will perform this.I recognize many individuals in Washington, so many folks who take a trip to DC and New York City, so many that are flies, that I felt certain I will acquire at least a couple of pieces of bad news over the next handful of times. I acquired the initial one today when I discovered that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that struck the Pentagon was Chic Burlingame, a classmate of mine. I came across Chic throughout cadet summer season when our team resided in the D&B with each other, as well as our experts possessed tons of training class together. I can not picture what he needs to of looked at, and now I hear that he might have risen further than our team can also consider by probably preventing his airplane from being actually the one to deal with the White Home. What a terrible reduction, but I'm sure Chic was actually combating bravely to the end. And also rips don't move the very same precede ...It's complicated to illustrate exactly how it really feels to be the only American completely off the earth at a time like this. The sensation that I need to be there with each of you, taking care of this, helping somehow, is actually frustrating. I understand that our experts perform the limit (or even beyond) of a horrible switch in the background of the globe. A lot of traits will never ever coincide once again after September 11, 2001. Not merely for the manies thousand and 1000s of individuals straight affected through these horrendous process of violence, yet probably for all of us. Our team are going to discover ourselves feeling in different ways regarding dozens of traits, including perhaps area exploration, sadly.It's terrible to observe smoke putting coming from cuts in your personal country from such a superb perspective. The dichotomy of getting on a space capsule dedicated to boosting daily life on the earth and viewing lifestyle being actually destroyed through such premeditated, horrible actions is actually jolting to the mind, regardless of who you are. As well as the understanding that every little thing will definitely be various than when we released by the time our company land is a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation as well as in our leadership that our team are going to do everything achievable to better safeguard her as well as our family members, and to take justice wherefore has been performed. I have peace of mind that the really good individuals at NASA will certainly do every thing essential to proceed our goal securely as well as return our team safely at the right time. As well as I skip every one of you significantly. I can not exist along with you in person, and also our company have a long way to visit accomplish our objective, however be actually certain that my center is actually with you, as well as understand you remain in my prayers.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the final letter ... Luckily, it is actually been a busy full week up right here. And to prove that, like our country, our experts are continuing our intended pathway with organization customarily (as much as feasible). Tonight the most recent add-on to the station, the Russian Docking Compartment are going to be actually introduced coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday evening (United States opportunity), it will dock along with our company, at a port certainly never utilized just before on the low point side of the Company Module. This brand-new module will definitely offer our company an additional spot to dock a Development or Soyuz as well as will offer a sizable airlock with two useable hatches for conducting EVA's in Russian Orlan meets, which our team will do a few of before our experts return.The concern before in taking care of this week was insufficient news. The problem now is actually way too much. It arrived simultaneously when e-mail was rejuvenated, and also there is actually not enough opportunity to review it all! Plus it is actually as well difficult to cope with all of it at the same time. Yet I value acquiring it, as well as I actually appreciate the terrific characters of assistance and also relationship I am actually receiving.Our company are actually prospering on board, obtaining our work done, and referring to factors. Last night our company had a lengthy discussion over dinner regarding the importance of these events, the possible actions to comply with, as well as what must be actually done. After dinner, Michael resolved informing me that every e-mail he received coming from good friends in Russia mentioned exclusively to tell me how sorry they were actually that this occurred, stretching their condolences, as well as asking how I was actually performing. Vladimir instructed me the Russian word for "condolences" after consulting with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star City. (Both the Russian and also the English phrases are actually much too long to verbalize simply.) Very kind individuals.For the final pair of times, the Russian MCC has sufficed to broadcast online broadcasts of broadcast headlines concerning the occasion as well as associated stories, to see to it I was actually effectively notified. Every specialist who has actually begun free throw line to explain a method or even a concern has at some aspect prolonged introductions to me with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom told us that due to the wedding of remembrance in the US, all the time individuals had been delivering blooms and edging all the wall surfaces of the US consulate in Moscow, and this evening they were actually igniting candlesticks in the street outside the consulate. How the world has actually altered.Individuals almost everywhere seem to recognize the senselessness and scary in this particular strike. And also the incredible loss. Moscow has handled these type of problems in the final handful of years along with apartment and also metro battles, so they are actually as restless to remove this hazard as our experts are actually. However the bottom line is actually that there are excellent folks anywhere that wish to reside in tranquility. I go through that a kid inquired, "America is so good to various other nations, we regularly help every person, just how can they dislike our team a great deal?".I wish the example of participation as well as depend on that this spacecraft and all the people in the course display daily will at some point influence the remainder of the world to work the same way. They must!Regrettably, our team will not be flying over the US during the time individuals are lighting candles. Do not understand if we could observe that anyhow. Our company carried out, however, observe a very unique and also attractive attraction a few mins ago: the launch of our Docking Chamber on a Soyuz enhancer. We were eclipsing it and it emerged regarding three minutes after its launch from Baikonur as the sun reached our station, so it was actually still unaware. It seemed like a huge comet with a straight, large rear silhouetted against the dark world underneath. Despite some bad lighting fixtures for a while as the sun hit our home window at a low perspective, I dealt with some video clip of it as to begin with our company passed the spacecraft, and then watched it start to catch up as it gained height and velocity. I filmed till major motor cutoff and booster separation happened just as our company approached dawn on the Himalayas. A memorable attraction in a remarkable week ...Life takes place, also in space. We are actually below to stay ... Frank.